Wednesday, June 26, 2013

30 for 30 - Happy Birthday to me!

My husband watches this show 30 for 30. I don't really know what it's about except sports...I think it's inspirational sports stories or something.  I don't know.  But I thought it would make a catchy title for 30 things I learned in my 30th year as I prepare to turn 31 (when did that happen??? today, it happened today.  Happy Birthday to Me!)





1) Marriage is hard.  Like really hard.  But it's also worth every ounce of blood, sweat and tears that you put into it, if you're with the right person (and I am).

2) Owning your home is more important than I thought.  Nothing wrong with renting at all, I love our rental place but having given up my condo that I owned to move to Texas into a rental took away a certain stability that I always felt in my own place.

3) Work sucks.  Work is awesome.  It depends on the day.  Don't let either version dictate how you live the rest of your life.

4) Words hurt and heal.  I often hold stuff back to prevent hurting my husband.  It fails.  When you feel strongly about something, just bloody say it and work it out.  It's going to come out eventually anyway.

5) Sometimes when you don't know what to say, it's good to stay silent.  But sometimes, you should probably keep thinking till you figure out what to say (especially if what you should say is I'm sorry).

6) Home is where the heart is...but your heart can be in two places and that's hard.

7) Workout, move, exercise.  Seriously, do something.  You'll thank yourself later.  The people who will get to love you for longer because you took care of yourself might not thank you out loud, but they'll be grateful.

8) Eat well.  Enjoy food and the experience of eating but fuel up with healthy eats.  Treat yourself but not all the time.


9) Hold on for dear life to friends that matter.  Not everyone will be a lifelong friend and that's fine. The ones that are, the ones you can fight with and know that you'll be just fine the next day, or the next week, hang on.  Hang on when life pulls you in different directions, or when jealousy rears it's ugly head or when it get hard because they will be your family for life.

10) Forgive easily.  A total work in progress for me but that saying that holding on to anger is like drinking poison expecting the other person to die is completely true.  Don't drink the poison.

11) Value yourself - enough to speak your mind, enough to stay healthy, enough to not sleep with people to get out of awkward situations.

12) Family is important.  But you determine who constitutes family.  Forgive them easily, in the end the little hurts won't matter.

13) Travel whenever you can, even just to the next town.  See the world through someone else's eyes.  Don't be that person that thinks that because I grew up in Canada, I rode a dogsled to school (I didn't...I wish I did).

14) Take risks - big ones and small ones.  Don't be afraid to fail, that's just another opportunity to try.

15) Put yourself out there, you'll be surprised what you get back.

16) Things will never be exactly how you pictured them - not your wedding, not a gift you receive, not work, not anything.  Take it as it comes and always make the best of it, it's often way better than you thought.

17) Where you live matters less than how you view it.  If you live in Paris, but you see negatives all the time, Paris will suck.  If you live in the middle of nowhere and embrace what's around you, it will be awesome.  You decide.

18) Embrace friends and family and forgive easily.  You never know how much time you'll have.

19) Don't procrastinate.  Everything feels bigger the longer you let it sit.

20) Listen to all advice, then follow wisely.  Don't follow someone's path but don't be afraid to learn from it - we don't all have to make the same mistakes.

21) That being said, listen to your gut above all else.  It's the only thing that's never wrong.

22) Don't be afraid to say no - no to a job, no to a date, no to helping someone.  There's a reason we say put your oxygen mask on first before helping others - if you've taken no time for yourself, you'll find yourself with nothing to give.

23) In that vein, selflessness is not the opposite of selfishness.  It's just another form of selfishness that forces others to care for you because you refuse to care for yourself.  You can prioritize yourself while still caring for others.

24) Celebrate birthdays (yours and others).  You never know which one will be your last.

25) Value your health.  This is the only body you'll get and you want to make the most of it.

26) Say I love you to those you love every time you say good-bye.  Even when you're mad...especially when you're mad.  You might not get another chance.

27) We can all learn from all other cultures and ways of life.  But that doesn't mean we can't celebrate our own and cherish it.  Every way of life has benefits and drawbacks, it's worth deciding for yourself what you accept.

28) Save and spend.  You can't take it with you when you go, so blow some money on trips and indulging and sharing with those you life.  But since you don't know how long it'll be until you go, don't make yourself a burden to your family but having no plan for your financial future.

29) It's never too late to say I'm sorry or I love you or I was wrong or I wish I hadn't done that or I wish I hadn't said that or You mean the world to me or any other version of I love your or I'm sorry.  Even if you think it's years too late, just say it.  It probably won't hurt...it might heal.

30) Love and live passionately.  No matter how many times you get hurt, no matter how many times you fall down, keep going.  Assume the world is a great place and assume the best of people.  It's not about being naive, it's about not being jaded.

What have you learned so far? 

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